It seems like lately my Facebook and Twitter timeline is full of people either having children, in a serious relationship and/or getting married or engaged. Most of these people are folks that I went to middle/high school with or undergrad with. It’s happening so often that I’m starting to ask myself if I’m doing something wrong, but the more I ask myself I realize “nah…I’m good luv, enjoy”. In all reality, there are many benefits of being single…just hear me out.
There are a few types of single people out there.
There’s the single person who secretly longs to be in a serious relationship but acts like they’re okay with being single (Single Type 1).
Then there’s the single person who has been damaged in a past relationship but no matter many how badly they want to give the dating scene a shot they’re just “not ready to do that sort of thing” again (Single Type 2).
And then there’s me, the single person who genuinely enjoys being single and going with the flow and living life (Single Type 3).
I’ve definitely been all of the 3 types of single people at some point but being the single person who is okay with being single has been the most refreshing and gratifying. Like actually refreshing. My appreciation for the benefits of being single sadly came about long after the close to a plagued relationship but that’s a story for another day.
CLICK TO READ LATER: Why You Need To End Your “Situation-ship” And Respect Yourself More
Honestly as a 20 something, I think it is perfectly acceptable for me to be okay with being single. By being okay with I don’t mean having a “I don’t need a man attitude.” I mean having a “when I cross paths with the man GOD has intended for me, it will happen because its suppose to” kind of attitude.
What are the benefits of being single? Well, there are quite a few things.
1. Working on myself and really getting my ish together.
Working on oneself clearly is subjective. For me it means staying focused on my goals and building for my future. Also getting closer to GOD and really working on that relationship is a very important goal and benefit of being single.
2. Enjoying my own company and space.
This is one of my favorite benefits of being single. I can’t express how much I personally enjoy my time alone. Is that bad? If it is then oh well. Everyone needs a little time alone to collect their thoughts and just be totally uninhibited.
Personal time for me could be spent doing many things such as trying a new recipe, watching something I find interesting on TV/online or something as simple as writing. I also enjoy the pleasure of having a clean home without having to clean up after anyone or donating a draw for my mate to keep his personal belongings in…in my home.
3. Turn-ups with the girls!
It’s a blessing to be single and have single friends (and no, there’s nothing wrong with us). When you have girlfriends that you love and enjoy spending time with, it’s a celebration every time y’all link up. My girls and I particularly love to brunch, go to happy hours and travel. We’re a match made in single heaven.
Let’s be real. When one of your girl friends get into a serious relationship, you tend to not see her at the “turn ups” as often. Why you ask? Because she is head over heels in lust/love with bae and couldn’t blow off those puppy dog eyes and all that testosterone to be acting ratchet with her frannnnnnnnns (unfortunately for her).
4. Enjoying the dating scene and getting to see what you do and do not want in a mate.
Dating ain’t easy and sometimes can be very much uncomfortable. Sitting across a table at dinner from someone that you barely know, trying to get to spark up conversation and while attempting to eat as cute as possible can be a little bit nerve racking.
Some dates will go well, some haywire but hopefully in the end you’ll be able to meet some nice people along the way even if you guys don’t get married with 2 children, a dog and a house with a white picket fence. Oh, and if I can be totally honest with you the free food, drinks and activities are always a plus.
5. Being selfish in your 20’s is acceptable. I am (for the most part) the only person that influences the decisions I make in life right now.
Want to take that job you dreamed of out in California? Go for it! Fly across the nation. When it comes to life’s make or break decisions, not having another human being acting as a major influence can in a way open you up to more opportunities and of course make difficult decisions a tad bit easier.
6. Lastly, my truly favorite part of being single…my bed
That may sound like something very trivial but after a long day I definitely do enjoy stretching across my bed and not having to worry about if the person on the other side feels comfortable or not. AND, no snoring! The sound of snoring drives me up the wall (always has) and I’m so grateful to not have to endure that and rest very peacefully at night.
Being single can honestly be some of the best years of your life, If you make them that. It really isn’t time for you to drown in your sorrows and boo hoo about no one liking you.Especially when you’re young. Don’t we already have enough to deal with as it is?
Go out there and enjoy some life experiences that turn into great stories further down the road until your Prince Charming comes knocking at your condo door!
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