Home Uncategorized Why Black Men Are Over Dating Black Women

Why Black Men Are Over Dating Black Women



If you had some type “wtf” response to the title of this post, then were on the same page. Here’s the background of how this idea/topic whatever you’d like to call it came to my mind.

Not too long ago I was in the Greyhound bus station in NYC, minding my business (as per usual) when a random drunk man sparked up a conversation with me. It was actually more like an unsolicited testimony but to each is own.

He began to tell me that he was in the Greyhound station, not traveling, because he didn’t go home to his wife (whom he adds is white) and his young son. Why didn’t he go home you ask? Because he thought that buying himself a $3000 pair of earrings for his birthday without telling his wife was appropriate. She wasn’t too happy about that. And this is where the topic at hand comes to play. After telling me this sob story, he turns to me and says “Black women are mean”

Me: *slowly turns head* “And sir, what have you, as a black man, done to contribute to that?”

Dude: *totally avoids answering the question* “I want to be treated like a King, and I’ll treat my women like a Queen. I don’t want to argue and have all that attitude blah blah blah”

So basically this “black women being mean” crap was his reasoning why he wanted to be with a with a white woman. Ummm? So just me keeping it real, I get where the basis of this “theory” comes from but by no means agree with. I don’t know how, I don’t know why but yes black women are noticeably more assertive than women of other races. I know myself personally, I was raised to not let people walk all over me just because I’m a minority and a woman. I’m also not going to act like sometimes this mentality doesn’t trickle into our relationships because it does (I think that’s the point that dude was getting at).


Yet and still, I’m sure there is a white woman or woman of another race and background that doesn’t take mess from grown men pulling boylike stunts.

Kanye west gold digger

“..and when he get on, he leave your ass for a white girl” -Ye

But him sitting there and justifying that the reason he was not in a relationship with a black women was bullsh*t because he’s just foolish. If you wanting to pull foolish stunts in a relationship has turned you off of black women because “they’re not having that” then so be it. By all means save us the trouble. I think any sensible woman would have been mad if their husband made a large purchase without discussing it with them beforehand.

I can’t even say maybe a black woman would have handled it worse than a white woman because he said out his own mouth that he was scared to go home because she may throw hot curlers at him. I guess his little theory backfired on him.

This is a very interesting topic though. Especially considering the fact the many black women feel that once a black man is successful he doesn’t want to be with a black women. He’d rather have a white or “exotic” looking woman to share his success with.

So is the stereotype true about black women being mean? Not even just in a relationships, in any aspect. Do we just walk around like some Ninjas’s With Attitudes in comparison to our white/hispanic/etc counterparts?


Takhirah Monét September 17, 2015 - 10:14 pm

I think if other races of women had to deal w/ the bullshit we (Black women) have to go thru on the daily basis they’d be “mean” to.

It’s too simple to say a white woman doesn’t give attitude or that her mood is better. Does a white woman have to experience the same things as a BW? No. Never in a million years. The BM who feel that way can stay w/ their white/latina/asian/etc women cuz we don’t need those types anyway.

mika725 September 17, 2015 - 10:20 pm

My same exact sentiments . Not to say that other women don’t have issues but we
carry the burden of 2 classes of issues (black and women)

Christopher Stewart September 20, 2015 - 10:56 am

I think BW deal with BM on a whole different level. BW get BM when they are broken and we make them feel better. We build them up and then when other races get them it’s the better version, so they’re is no need to be “mean” to him because all of a sudden he’s this great guy too other woman. BW deal with a million things and we also have to raise a BM. BW are tired.

mika725 September 20, 2015 - 11:36 am

That is a very valid point. It’s actually very weird to me that our relationships with black men tend to play out that way.

Christine Maner January 4, 2017 - 5:06 pm

People tend to generalize a type of behavior to the entire culture. In addition, sometimes people justify their own lack of initiative, poor decisions or other negative attributes by stereotyping other people, gender or cultures. Simply because a person has had negative encounters with a small percentage of a culture does not mean that the entire culture takes on the attributes of the few.
For example, I currently work at a school where a majority of my students are African American and whose fathers are absent, in jail, or other. I can’t then apply those attributes to ALL African American men. There are plenty of AA men ( my own brother) who are God fearing, successful men. Let’s not project our own insecurities and low self worth on to a culture.
Jesus Christ offered His life so that ALL men can be free. If God, perfect and holy can love all His creations equally, what right do we have as sinners ( Romans 3:23 ) to not love.


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