Home Uncategorized How I’m Getting Over My “Birthday Blues”

How I’m Getting Over My “Birthday Blues”


Happy Birthday To Me?


birthday bluesI have forced myself to say these words over the past 3 years or so.

If we rewind to my 19th birthday, I was still one of those very annoying people that would not let you forget it was my birthday for weeks months on in. Now, I’m typically in my “birthday bag”, secretly wishing to myself that no one brings it up. Yay, time is moving faster and I’m just getting older by the second with so many things that have yet to be done.

There are many reason’s why I, and many other people, have subcummed to feeling blue on their Birthday:

  • Too may expectations
  • Waiting for others to make your birthday “happy”
  • Focusing on what you haven’t accomplished versus what you have at your current age
  • All the stresses of adulting and life
  • Comparing yourself to your peers (the deadly one)
  • And did I say expectations of what a birthday is supposed to be like?

birthday blues

I had the craziest birthday meltdown ever on my 22nd Birthday in the middle of a busy street in NYC. I’m talking extreme rage on the verge of tears. I literally cut my birthday celebration short because I was fed up with everything.

In my head,  I was too old to enjoy the things that I once enjoyed and even the company of people that I once adored. I was also pretty depressed about not knowing what was really next for me. Or maybe it was anxiety; who fucking knows.


birthday blues

I was too focused on all the things that I wish I had accomplished by age 22 to even be excited about celebrating “my day”. Let’s not forget about all the responsibility that comes with adulting and the damper that it can put on life as we know it. Another birthday in my eyes just meant another step to me being a full grown adult, which honestly is overrated. Who’s bright idea was this anyways?

Another birthday in my eyes just meant another step to me being a full grown adult, which honestly is overrated. Who’s bright idea was this sh*t anyways?

I’ll be 23 soon (July 25th)  and I’ve decided that I can’t let the stresses of life get me down about my birthday. I’m in a much better place in 2016 than I was in 2015. This birthday, I’ll be starting my first post-grad grown up job back in my hometown NYC. I’m excited and extremely thankful for that blessing. Quite frankly many people don’t see a full-time position that they have just a slight bit of interest in until years after graduation.

Check out this article Facing Reality: How I Knew It Was Time To Quit My Job

I wrote an article a while back on xoNecole where I shared a list of things that are helping me stop being such a self-critic. It’s dangerous, it’s detrimental and a big DON’T if you ever want to make it somewhere in life. I’m officially adding to that list “celebrate your accomplishments” instead of dwelling on your “losses”.

birthday blues rihannaAge ain’t nothing but a number and it shouldn’t make you feel a way about “where you should be” in life. And most importantly, everyone’s journey is not the same. Stop focusing on where you “should” be at this stage in your life based on comparisons to your peers, colleagues and anyone else that more than likely isn’t paying your bills.

Your birthday, a.k.a. the day you were born is to celebrate you. No one, including yourself, should bring any negative vibes to that one day of the year. Seeing another day and being given another 24 hours to work diligently toward’s whatever goals you have marked down somewhere should be enough to make every birthday happier than the last.


beyonce birthday twerk

What are your grateful for this birthday year?

 You may also enjoy this post on my favorite NYC brunch spot from my Birthday last year! You wouldn’t want to miss it 🙂


Raven July 25, 2016 - 10:25 am

“Your birthday, a.k.a. the day you were born is to celebrate you.” Enjoyed reading this + could def relate to your post. I just turned 23 too and realized that I had to put myself first in order to have my own happy birthday.


Lyndsey Camille August 5, 2016 - 10:43 am

Happy Belated Birthday! I’ve had to learn to stop feeling that way and to just live life as well. Dwelling on what I should’ve/could’ve done gets to be so stressful and creates so much negativity. I turn 20 this year and although I’m a little nervous to lose the “teen” on my age, I’m ready to open up a new chapter!


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